I think we can all agree bullying can have negative effects on a person's mental and even physical health. It creates social and emotional issues and can have long-term effects on self-esteem.
Bullies are more likely to have substance abuse, academic problems and violent tendencies later in life.* Those who are a bully and also being bullied are at a greater risk of both mental and behavioral problems than those who are only being bullied.
Both those who bully and those being bullied are at risk of depression according to NICHD research studies. And bullying doesn't just happen in hallways or a classroom. Now they happen on social media, cell phones and other cyber means.
What to Do
If your child is being bullied, or you suspect they may be, talk to them. Give them advice on how to avoid conflict and not to reward the bully with a desired reaction. Teach them how to find an adult to assist with the situation. If it is online bullying, you will need to monitor online use and activity. Blocking the person causing the problem should also help. In addition, reach out to school personnel with the issue so they are aware.
Don't forget to talk with your child frequently about how they're feeling and offer as much support as possible. Build up their self confidence and be a good role model. They are still growing and learning from your example!
If Your Child is the Bully
Most of the time kids will act out if something is bothering them. Try to find the root of the problem. Talk to them openly, give them warmth and attention, avoid verbal outbursts or physical punishments, and reward good behavior with assuring words. Sometimes they just need acknowledged and taught how to control their emotions instead of taking it out on others.
If your efforts do not seem to help, a guidance counselor, therapist or other mentor/role model may be able to work with them. It's also beneficial to notify their teachers to watch their behaviors so you can have an idea of what is going on when you are not around them.
If you feel bullying is an issue in your school, an Upshift with Chad presentation may be something to consider. Chad has a unique and relatable story to keep students engaged. For more information contact him here.
Smokowski, P. R., & Kopasz, K. H. (2005). Bullying in school: An overview of types, effects, family characteristics, and intervention strategies. Children and Schools, 27, 101–109.
Reece, T. (2008). Bullies beat down self esteem. Retrieved June 17, 2016, from http://www.healthychildren.org/English/safety-prevention/at-play/Pages/Bullies-Beat-Down-Self-Esteem.asp
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